I'm beginning to feel like the light at the end of the tunnel has burned out, and that it will be quite a while before someone gets around to replacing it. Usually, my life goes in cycles, and everything will be gross for a week (or even a few days within a week), but then it will subside and the tide will roll out again. It helps me to be optimistic, because I can tell myself, "Okay, all I have to do is make it through next week, and then I'll be home free."
So, all I have to do right now is make it through this next week (an eight-page paper that's already quite overdue, two concerts, a test for which I haven't even begun studying, probably two lessons, a masterclass performance, and several rehearsals for things that I really don't have time to do), and the week after that (Chamber orchestra concert, another masterclass performance, cello studio midterm, family coming into town, playing for one of those things I don't have time for, freaking SENIOR RECITAL) . . .
and honestly, I have no idea what happens after that. Right now my life is very segmented. I think of it in terms of this:
Before Recital.
After Recital.
If it's After Recital, that means that I don't think about it right now at all. So I am not. Right now, my life ends on March 24.
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